red

GEORGES DUBŒUF – BEAUJOLAIS-VILLAGES (2020): 9.0

Reds

The first word that comes to mind with this wine is divine. The second word is dangerous. How are you not supposed to drink the entire bottle in one sitting? Hell, if I was really thirsty I could see myself chugging it all in 15 seconds or less.

This beaujolais is beaujo-slaying with its wonderfully lithe body and juicy flavors, cola undertones not to be missed. I cannot underestimate how easy it is to throw this thing down your gullet. It’s basically a honey pot for your wine cravings. Sadly I paired this wine with a white cheddar rice cake but it somehow makes my 45 calorie snack feel elevated, the strong berry notes of the wine complimenting the weird flavor profile of the cheese powder.

This beaujolais is also beaujo-monopolizing the cursed Wine & Spirits on 2nd & Girard, it being the only beauj I could find there. It’s quite likely that I’m just an idiot and couldn’t find other options. But with the recent local craze over beauj, you’d expect the store to make their inventory a bit more identifiable. Of course, this store has an entire section dedicated only to “Boxed Wine”, so my expectations may be a bit unrealistic. At least they’re selling this baby at only $14.99 a bottle.

SEPTIMA – MALBEC (2018): 9.0

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a light, juicy malbec that’s perfect for summer (:

SHORT DESCRIPTION

  • LIGHT
  • JUICY
  • MINERAL-Y
  • QUICK IN DA MOUTH
  • “GENTLE” – RYAN “I THINK I ACTUALLY SAID ‘SOFT’” WILDSMITH
  • BERRIES N CHERRIES

LONG DESCRIPTION

Wow! I usually shy away from Malbecs because they can be a little too dry and peppery for me. Now that I’m verrrry deep into a true blood rewatch I extra-prefer wines that feel ripe & alive (read: like blood). I opened this sexy lil wine along with a Manchego and holy shit – I was blown away by the experience. I could literally taste the minerals in both the cheese and the wine. They accentuated each other in a way that felt almost spiritual. Alone, both the cheese and the wine were great. But together, damn. The experience made me understand why wine & cheese are a long-standing pair. Also made me sour that I’ll no longer have the chance to visit Spain this summer.

DEFINITELY buy this wine. I think it was about $16 at the Acme on Passyunk. And buy the Dibruno Bro’s manchego cheese while you’re at it!! A perfect pair to consume while your disassociating in Bon Temps with Sookie Stackhouse and Vampire Bill.

SOLA – PINOT NOIR (2017): 7.5

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7.5

A peppery Pinot Noir that somehow manages to be boring

SHORT DESCRIPTION

  • LIGHT
  • BERRIES
  • VANILLA
  • PEPPER BUT THE WAY AN OLD CHEAP CIGARETTE IS PEPPERY
  • WOOD. MAYBE IT’S BURNT WOOD AND NOT PEPPER.
  • OK I THINK THE TASTE IS ACTUALLY OLD CIGARETTE
  • WHERE: BOTTLE SHOP

LONG DESCRIPTION

Oh gosh. I was really excited for this Pinot after the so-so experience with the Camelopard but now I’m missing that stupid wine. I’m rating this wine higher than the Camelopard only because it’s somewhat more exciting to drink than the Camel and excitement is hard to come by these days. I also paid $22 for it so I guess I’m Sour Graping myself.

The wine is fine. It’s light, and there are berries in there, somewhere beneath the harsh bite of what I first thought was pepper and now I’m pretty sure is the taste of a two year old L&M. The bottle says something about “toasted cedar” which is how I would describe the taste of a cigarette if I was an asshole. It’s pretty quick in the mouth and I bet it would be good with Indian or Mexican food, as most peppery/cig wines are.

But I can’t help but feel a little swindled with this one. And I wanna make a disclaimer: I really like the Bottle Shop. They have amazing beers and a great staff and they’re working hard through this quarantine. But their wine selection & prices have been total baloney since they started selling wine over a year ago. They tend to get sort of niche $10 range wines and jack up the price 150%, 200%. This Sola wine sells at most for $14. I’ll keep buying their wine cuz it’s convenient and I feel dedicated to them, but I feel like the upcharge for this convenience & local loyalty is pretty hard to justify most of the time.

Anyway. It’s fine. It’s another overpriced red wine you could easily put back with a quarantine partner in a night, or save over a couple of days. I probably won’t ever buy it again but I’m definitely going to finish the bottle.

CAMELOPARD – CABERNET SAUVIGNON (2018): 7.0

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7.0

An OK, dry cabernet sauvignon that’s easy to drink and easy to cork.

SHORT DESCRIPTION

  • DRY
  • VANILLA AND SORT OF LEATHERY/EARTHY AFTERTASTE
  • BERRIES
  • ALCOHOL
  • WHERE: BOTTLE SHOP

LONG DESCRIPTION

I’ve been getting pretty sick of straight gin on ice and now that I’m entering week 4 of quarantine (!!!), I wanted something complex, something I could sit with a while, something (ANYTHING) to bide the time.

So I ordered a cab from the Bottle Shop in East Passyunk. As far as wines go, I am big on Pinot Noir most of the time, except when I want something dry (Malbec, the gin of wines). Cabs tend to waffle between the extremes of light and juicy to full bodied and dry more often than I prefer, and I’m reminded of this when I take my first sip of Camelopard. The berries and vanilla are as pronounced as its alcohol content. Dry and too long in the mouth with a curious aftertaste I actually kind of like, but my boyfriend doesn’t. Important to note that I also love drinking raw black seed oil and would totally consume gasoline if it wouldn’t kill me.

But it’s fine for what it is. It’s a red wine in quarantine, one of the only cab savs I could get delivered to my house without spending a buck. I feel like it seems more elite than it really is, and it probably has its kindofcool label to thank for that. If I blind tasted it, I’d assume this was a $7-$10 bottle of gas station wine, but I paid a terribly marked up $14 for this guy. All in all, it gets the job done, and I’ve had it as an appetizer wine for three days in a row. Its lack of body makes it easy to pick up and easy to put down as well.